Author: Seniye Groff

Las Cruces Part Two

Posted on by Seniye Groff

Day two consisted of Organ Mountains National Monument and Dripping Springs Trail. The hot temperatures forced me to slow down a bit. May was the 10th anniversary of this monument so entry was free. The spring was almost dry and the abandoned buildings suggested there was an outpost at one point. An early morning hike was the best way to counteract the heat with a rest in the middle of the day and then White Sands National Park in the evening for a sunset view.

I drove to Alamogordo for dinner since it is only 14 miles past White Sands National Park and sunset was the goal. I headed to the park at 6 p.m. Unfortunately the visitor center closed at 6 so I headed right into the park. It, too, was a free entry since it was after 6 p.m. It is mind blowing that the sand oasis exists in the middle of nowhere. It looks like snow but it really is sand! This park was the highlight of my trip.

Las Cruces, New Mexico

Posted on by Seniye Groff

I have traveled to NM since 2016 and love the natural beauty, eclectic cuisine, overarching diversity and incredibly blue skies. I have primarily explored Albuquerque and north including Santa Fe, Taos and Abiquiu. As a child I was mesmerized by Georgia O’Keeffe and her spectacular paintings of this beautiful state.

This trip was focused on driving south from Albuquerque to Las Cruces, with several stops along the way. The primary destination was White Sands National Park, but of course, there is so much to see beyond this amazing national park. I flew into Albuquerque and spent the night and started the trek early the next morning.

The first stop was in Truth or Consequences. This is a tiny town known for its hot springs…and apparently movie location scouts. I was told that a movie just wrapped up in this speck of a town. It was pretty quiet and when I asked the locals what I should check out in the town, they collectively could suggest up with nothing! I have heard the Geronimo Museum is quirky, weird and interesting all in one. I did not visit, but maybe you should.

From TOC, I focused on getting to Las Cruces. I stayed in the cutest 1938 home powered with all the modern amenities, right next to the downtown area. Walking the two minutes to the downtown was a daily occurrence to grab coffee, food and a dose of people watching. Friday night there was a night market and an impressive farmer’s market on Saturday morning. It was more crafts than the typical veggies but there was some fresh produce. I am always amazing at the creative talent that these artisans produce.

Once cooled off, it was time to search out the quirky items on my list such as the largest chili pepper in the world and the recycled road runner. Neither disappointed! Then visited the town of Mesilla and the noteworthy basilica.

I’ll post the next day’s events in a separate post.

Bias and Intersectionality Part Three

Posted on by Seniye Groff

Our Inner Bias/Inner Critic can be our own worst enemy. Our inner bias can show up as:

  • Shame
  • Self-doubt
  • Low confidence
  • Beliefs that propel you forward or hold you back

What to do:

  • Be aware of it
  • Pause
  • Show yourself compassion
  • Get curious

Calm you inner bias:

  • Explore what beliefs hold you back.
  • Decide what different data can you use to make different assumptions.
  • What contrary evidence exists?  Choose to scrutinize your assumptions.

Bias and Intersectionality Part Two

Posted on by Seniye Groff

Women are in a “no win” situation and walk a tightrope of meeting societal demands for women to demonstrate female characteristics of compassion, warmth, communication and collaboration vs leadership characteristics  (dominated by male characteristics) of forceful, assertive, dominant and competitive.

Did you know? When women display male characteristics, they are seen as competent but not liked.  When they display female characteristics they are viewed as less competent. Women leaders are seen as competent or likeable but rarely both. I saw this play out in my own career and it is incredibly frustrating.

And when you add women of different race, ethnic, sexual and gender identities to the tightrope of gender bias it gets even more complicated navigating the ladder to success.

A few ways bias shows up:

  • Pay gap
  • #Metoo  wakeup call  sexual abuse, harassment, microaggressions at work
  • COVID and “second shift” awareness
  • Who gets promoted or the cool assignments
  • Who gets listened to

How else have you seen bias show up?

Bias and Intersectionality

Posted on by Seniye Groff

I am presenting the topic of Bias and Intersectionality this week. It is to a group of women new in their careers. Bias is a well-used word but what does it really mean?

Fact: The world does not view women and men the same.

Gender bias is: When people show favoritism toward one gender over another.

Women vs Men:

  • Conscious and unconscious. = women and men are treated differently.
  • Bias is hardwired in our brains to help us make sense of the world quickly.
  • Bias creates different expectations for different genders (in this example).
  • Bias transforms into prejudice, differential treatment and inequality.
  • Women and men experience the world in vastly different ways. 
  • Social norms continue to reinforce this bias.

What examples have you seen where bias comes into play?

Tackle Financial Discipline in 2024

Posted on by Seniye Groff

I recently met a friend for a hike and she shared that she made $35K more in 2023 than she expected. Great news…you would think. The challenge was that she had nothing to show for the additional income. In other words she spent every cent of it plus some. She asked my advice on how she could do better. Here’s what I told her:

  • Live below your means. In other words, act like you make a lot less than you do. Too often we garner a larger paycheck and instead of “paying ourselves” we literally go on a shopping spree of life…bigger house, nicer car, the latest phone etc. Ask yourself, “What do I really need?” and “Does all that stuff really make me happier, anyway?”
  • Put all her various accounts into one investment account. Every time she left a job, she left her 401k with her previous employer. It essentially sits there and is forgotten. If she pulled all of them together, she could create a wholistic plan and be more strategic with her money. I am sure you’ve heard the mantra of being diversified in your portfolio. Well an easy way to accomplish this is to know what you have and have easy access to it…all of it.
  • Shopping…many a person’s downfall. And my friend is no exception. I suggested that she pause…when she sees something instead of immediately buying it, walk away. Think about it. Check out what is already in her closet. Determine how much she will really wear it. And after all that analysis, if she still wants it or “needs” it, then buy it! More likely she will have moved on and forgotten that must-have item.
  • Have a plan and work your plan. Have an end game and then work towards it. All of this financial responsibility should be working towards a goal so I suggested to her that she needs to know what her goal is.
  • Live a little, too. All work and no play would make life pretty boring and dry and there is nothing wrong with a reward here and there. Instead of a bunch of little rewards (clothing, coffee, etc.) how about one really big, glorious reward like a fabulous trip?!

Share your ideas in the comments!

What’s Your Defining Moment of 2023?

Posted on by Seniye Groff

It’s difficult to believe that 2023 is coming to a close. I feel, like many I am sure, that I was just celebrating New Years Eve yesterday! 2023 has been a pretty good year, especially compared to last several years of craziness! I had six new clients this year and two ongoing clients. I created a DEI practitioners group, delivered three industry presentations and provided yearlong mentoring to several women. I also took on volunteering weekly teaching English to local refugees and immigrant newcomers. Teaching ESL has been more challenging than I originally envisioned but it’s certainly rewarding work to see someone so motivated to improve their circumstances through learning English.

As we end this year, I think its important to pause and think about what 2023 meant to us personally and what we hope for 2024. The beginning of a new year allows us to start fresh, which can be invigorating. I write down my goals for 2024 (both work and personal) and also a bucket list for the year, too. Writing things down for me makes the goals and desires tangible. And who doesn’t love crossing something off a list??!! I also go through my calendar week-by-week to see all I really accomplished. And since I use IG as an online journal, I revisit all my posts to relive the year in pictures!

So goodbye 2023 and HELLO 2024. I wish everyone a healthy and happy 2024.  What will be your defining moment for 2024? Plan now and make it happen!

Share in the comments what you do to close out one year and welcome the next.

“Atomic Habits” by James Clear

Posted on by Seniye Groff

“Imagine changing just one word: You don’t ‘have’ to. You ‘get’ to.”

James Clear, page 131

I just finished reading “Atomic Habits” and even though I consider myself a highly disciplined and motivated person, this book still gave me some great ideas. I appreciated all the examples and resources available on Clear’s website. I will be the first person to admit that most business books can (and should be) encapsulated in a two-page article but Clear’s book is the exception. I loved Clear’s quote, “Habits are the compound interest of self-improvement.”

I certainly believe this is true for myself. For example, I work out every day. Come rain or shine, I am committed to MOVE every day. I walk, hike, play tennis and lift weights every week. I have been doing this since I was a teenager. I also was a big runner but my knee is troublesome now. Having knee pain and being unable to run (which I loved to hate) could have led me to be sedentary, but instead I was committed to keep moving in new and different ways. This commitment to the habit of moving has served me and my body well in middle-age. So Clear’s premise that habits can compound for or against you is definitely true in my case.

I also like Clear’s belief that habits are not about goals but instead about systems. Creating systems that support your habits makes complete sense. For example, when I traveled a lot for work, it would be easy to leave the airport and go home right away but I noticed that meant I was working out less. So I came up with a plan to have my workout clothes in the trunk of my car, this way I could easily drive directly to the gym from the airport instead of depending on myself being disciplined enough to go home to change and then drive to the gym.

Another recent example is taking my vitamins. I need to take some daily vitamins and yet I could never remember to do it. I also hate clutter on my kitchen counters but I knew in order to take my vitamins, they needed to be in easier reach (and sight). So the vitamins sit on my kitchen counter and are impossible to miss each morning. I am happy to say, I now take my vitamins daily because I designed my environment for success!

I am a big believer of taking ACTION. Clear shares a great story about taking action. In summary, a photography class broke the students into two groups: quantity and quality. In the quantity group, the students were graded by number of photos taken. It did not matter if they were good photos. The goal was to take a lot of photos. The quality group was required to turn in one photo for the entire semester. Their grade would depend on excellence. At the end of the term, all the best photos were taken by the quantity group. This group experimented, tried new methods and ideas and most importantly, learned from their mistakes. While taking hundreds of pictures, they improved their skills. Ultimately is it easy to get focused on perfection or ideas whereas taking action actually delivers an outcome. Talking or thinking about something does not produce results only ACTION produces results.

I loved the concepts of this book. If you read it or have read it already, share what you learned in the comments section!

My Favorite Moroccan Experience

Posted on by Seniye Groff

I was able to see eight distinct areas of Morocco including the mountains, the ocean and the desert. I loved each area and city but my favorite experience was the Sahara with its vastness and beauty. The sand is orange, the sun was stunning and the camel ride was unforgettable. And the biggest surprise was the sky at night. Without all the light pollution, the stars were plentiful and bright. I couldn’t get a picture of it, but I am sure I won’t forget that night sky any time soon!

The desert camp I stayed at was perfect. The food was some of the best I tasted during my trip (eggplant tajine forever!!!) and the after dinner music by the locals using traditional instruments coupled with the dancing and the opportunity to play the instruments myself, made for a unique night.